Painful Intercourse: What’s Going On and How to Fix It

If sex hurts, you’re not alone. Many people experience pain at some point, whether it’s a sharp pinch or an uncomfortable ache. The good news is that most reasons are treatable and often simple to address. Below we break down the usual suspects and give you clear actions you can start using right away.

Common Causes of Painful Sex

The first step is figuring out why it hurts. Vaginal dryness, for example, is a top cause for women and usually shows up when hormones shift or there’s not enough foreplay. Infections like yeast or bacterial vaginosis can also irritate the area and make penetration painful.

For men, an inflamed urethra, prostate issues, or tight pelvic muscles can create discomfort. Both partners might feel pain if there’s too much friction from a condom that doesn’t fit well or from inadequate lubrication.

Emotional factors matter, too. Stress, anxiety, or past trauma can tighten the pelvic floor and turn pleasure into pain. Even simple things like a new birth‑control method or medication side effects can change how your body reacts during sex.

Practical Steps to Relieve the Discomfort

Start with the basics: use plenty of water‑based lubricant. A few extra drops can make a big difference, especially if dryness is an issue. If you suspect an infection, see a health professional for testing and treatment—most infections clear up quickly with proper meds.

Give your body time to relax. Try longer foreplay, gentle massage, or breathing exercises to reduce muscle tension. Positions that allow deeper control over depth and angle (like spooning) often feel better when you’re dealing with pain.

If the problem persists, talk to a doctor about pelvic floor therapy. A physical therapist can teach stretches and relaxation tricks that target tight muscles. Hormonal changes might need a tweak in birth‑control or a short course of estrogen cream for women.

Lastly, keep communication open with your partner. Let them know what feels good and what doesn’t. Honest talk removes guesswork and lets you both adjust pace and pressure together.